Welcoming Prayer

It has been my first day without pain killers for my recently poorly back. I entered into centering prayer tonight and knowing that it is important not to allow physical sensations to distract, when the backpains started I almost gave up. Shifting from one position to the next was just not working! However the idea of "Welcoming Prayer" came to me. Basically it involves first entering into a feeling or emotion you wish to release from and then welcoming it. After moving from one to stage to the other the last stage is to let go of the desire for security, approval and control and finally the desire to change the situation as it is. (Cynthia Bourgeault excellently devotes a whole chapter to this in her book 'Centering Prayer and Inner Awakening' she sums up the process thus: 1:Focus & Sink In 2:welcome 3: Let go)
I decided to apply this to my backache. I focussed on the pain and welcomed it ocscillating between these two stages. At times feeling the pain without qualifying it as good or bad took the sting out of it. In the letting go I focussed specifically on the letting go of the desire to change the situation. In short a total acceptance of the discomfort which I felt prompted to use as my 'Sacred Word' (please note this is not a mantra but a word which simply is used to return to Centering Prayer when the mind has strayed - nothing more than that)*. Using this as my sacred word to return to His Presence was quite enlightening.
This welcoming prayer gesture being at the same moment the essence of my participation with presence seemd to mirror if not participate in the same spirit with which Jesus approached the Cross. The Central core of this specific time was an acceptance of pain which when let go of became the entry point of a deep participation of Jesus acceptance of the Cross at Gethsemene - 'Not my will but thine be done'.
Did the back ache ease or go? At times. In fact the 20 mins seemed to rush by but that was not the issue - one cannot at one and the same time welcome something and want it to go away. However it does raise the issue taht much of our suffering is caused by not accepting things as they are - being at odds with that which 'is'.

*The sacred  word  expresses our intention to be in God’s presence and to yield to the divine action (T K)

Lose yourself ... find Yourself!

I have been snailing around listening to an interesting commentary on Tolle's 'New Earth' book on the Oprah website (forgive me -slight cringe there!) . My conclusions have been that Eckhart Tolle and many self help methods coincide most in the whole area of acceptance ... In acceptance lieth Peace. Listening to Eckhart Tolle I find myself doing what I did with the Sedona Method... taking one step back from the 'false me' (The egoic, unconscious self) thus creating 'space', recognising the 'true conscious self' from the standpoint of one observing. With this detachment which the 'space' allows I am able, from an objective standpoint, to hold lightly (accept) all the feelings/thoughts without having any attachment to them. That acceptance = release. (It took me a long time to realise that RELEASE in the SM meant to ACCEPT.) This has been a great help to me. I am also aware of how I gravitate to allowing such negatives as worry, punishing myself, and even torment at the expense of PEACE in the MOMENT. 'Why?' I ask myself. Simply because in doing so the egoic self is strengthened. The Egoic Self (or Ego or self life) uses problems to attach to and constantly wants to find some hook on which to draw energy - anything but the present moment which brings an end to my 'little story' and the ME identity I build upon it! (Thanks ET for the terminology!) I am struggling with the 'pain body' concept but I guess I'm close to some idea of it with my explanation above.

I find great similarities here with my religious experience in that for the Christian there is a 'death to the old self' through the Cross and a 'rising to new life ' through the resurrection.

My one concern is the whole matter of introspection. With alot of these ideas and methods there can be an increasing amount of 'navel gazing' perhaps symbolised by the Buddhist eyes closed looking within. I find this disconcerting as the whole process of seeking release from the egoic self can in itself 'bite you in da bum' and simply be strengthening it! The only answer I can give to this without sounding incredibly pious is having found our way to escape personal egoic caused suffering to look away from ourselves, pick up the suffering around us and with proactive compassion make a change for those powerless to help themselves - even through small acts of kindness. The ultimate goal I think of all approaches to spiritual health should be therefore to lose ourselves for the sake of others and in so doing we shall find ourselves.

(This is an adjustment to a post elsewhere)